Lacking in any empathy, they have no regard for the damage they inflict on others. They delight in the kill counter going up just like an FPS player would. That the people on the other side of the screen are real makes no difference. To the people of Kiwi Farms, this is a videogame. I only found out about this relapse today. Worried that their friends would feel burdened by their condition again, Near decided to avoid the subject. The looming threat of Kiwi Farms, of their power to destroy not just Near but also their friends, caused them daily anxiety that just wouldn’t go away. Unfortunately, medication can be a fickle beast. I first heard from Near again in late October 2020, and we again started having chats. Eventually, they were luckily able to get help and found medication that helped them cope with the psychological scars of abuse in late 2020. Doxing some, directly harassing others, and even specifically seeking out suicidal people to target.Īfter falling down a spiral of depression and eventually breaking off contact with everyone last year, I feared for the worst. Not to be defeated in their pursuit of utter emotional and psychological destruction, they went after who Near treasured most: their friends. Many wouldn’t, but Near was strong enough to overcome that level of emotional abuse. From the comfort of anonymity, of sitting in front of their computer thousands of kilometers away, they take glee in slowly destroying the psyche of others, bit by bit. Members of that website make a sport of preying on the less fortunate, on those in positions liable to being emotionally abused. After an abusive childhood, and followed by community toxicity, Near was eventually targeted by Kiwi Farms. We’ve had long text conversations, and shared many stories. One of the most modest people I’ve ever known, they were unlikely to suggest hanging out in person, but never rejected an offer.

I’d known them for several years, but after they moved to Tokyo a few years back we started talking more often. Near was also an incredibly kind, funny, and welcoming person. They also recently released their ultimate labor of love, a fan translation of Bahamut Lagoon that might well be the most exacting and meticulously crafted language adaptation of a video game of the era. Working out the most elusive hardware glitches and corner cases, they advanced the world of SNES emulation by leaps and bounds. Developer of the bsnes, higan, and ares emulators, Near was a relentless force for accuracy in the formerly haphazard world of emulation. Despite this, they continued to pour their life into the one thing they loved: emulation and retro gaming.

Near was a brilliant mind in a corner of the web all too often rife with toxicity and harassment. This is not a weakness of the mind, it is a fundamental part of what it means to be human. A single, powerful traumatic event can change a person forever. Implying nobody is to blame but the victim and perpetrator, one and the same.īut that’s not how human brains work. Suicide is a voluntary action, a problem with oneself. That’s how a news article would phrase it. I saw a photo of the noose.ģ0 minutes into the call, Les Voyages De L'âme by Alcest started playing at the other end. They’d just taken a large overdose of codeine and guanfancine. At 11:45 on Sunday, I was on a phone call with Near.

Creator bsnes emulators has died